English Lunacy

Sometimes you have to believe that all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. Has it ever struck you that we are constantly standing meaning on its head? Let’s look at a number of familiar English words and phrases that turn out to be the opposite or something very different from what we think they mean.

A near miss. It is, in reality a collision. A close call is actually a near hit.

I’m speaking tongue in cheek. So how can anyone understand you?

I want to have my cake and eat it too. Shouldn’t this time old cliché be, I want to eat my cake and have it too? Isn’t it logical to hope to eat the cake and then still possess it?

A hot cup of coffee. Here again the English language gets us in hot water. Who cares if the cup is hot? Surely we mean a cup of hot coffee.

A hot water heater. Who heats hot water?

Preplan, prepone, preheat, prerecord. Who needs to pre-tentious prefix?

They do things behind my back. You want them to do things in front of your back?

Underwater and underground. Things that we claim are underwater and underground are obviously surrounded by, not under the water and ground.

Watch your head. I keep seeing these signs on low doorways, but I haven’t figured out how to follow the instructions. Trying to watch your head is like trying to bite your teeth.

We come to the conclusion that English is a crazy language. Still, you have to marvel at the unique lunacy of it, in which your house can simultaneously burn up and burn down, in which you fill in a form by filling out a form and in which you first chop a tree down and then you chop it up.

Pronunciation gone awry

Here are some of the words you and I are likely to use on a regular basis. We probably didn’t even realize that we were pronouncing them incorrectly all along. Have you ever heard someone say ‘aks’ instead of ‘ask’? I reckon that’s a ‘yes’. Go on and correct yourselves if you’re fumbling up with these words too.

Correct word	Mis-pronounced version	Brief
Hierarchy	Hi-archy	Remember, hierarchies go higher than you might think. This one is pronounced ‘higher archy’ and not ‘high archy’.
Espresso	Expresso	While I can't express my love for espresso enough, this word was borrowed from Italian well after the Latin prefix ex- had developed into es-.
February	Febyuary	We don't like two syllables in succession with an [r] so some of us dump the first one in this word. Most dictionaries now accept the single [r] pronunciation but, if you have an agile tongue, you may want to shoot for the original.
et cetera	excetera	Latin for 'and' (et) 'the rest' (cetera) are actually two words that probably should be written separately.
Probably	Probly/ prolly	Haplology is the dropping of one of two identical syllables such as the [ob] and [ab] in this word, usually the result of fast speech. Slow down and pronounce the whole word for maximum clarity and to reduce your chances of misspelling the word.
our	are	It is common to hear the pronou ‘our’ incorrectly pronounced like the verb ‘are’ or the letter r. The correct pronunciation is the same as hour. They have different spellings and meanings, but different pronunciations as well. Remember never to confuse the pronunciation of ‘our’ with ‘are’. As a reminder, think of our as being the same as hour, but without the h.

So, go on and pronounce them right!

Newsletters: Bringing back the human touch

It’s simple how a Newsletter (NL) achieves its communication objectives – through relationships. Newsletters build relations. And can do that extra bit, which an ad or a brochure can’t. Even before it can figure out the motive and game plan on how to achieve its client’s goals, the NL is living, breathing and existing on a belief system of establishing bonds of friendship, loyalty. Contrary to mainstream communication these days, which is constantly trying to fight for mindspace or stand out through mere glib text. Sometimes it concentrates so much on fighting clutter and presenting smart copy that it forgets to look deep enough into its audience’s psyche. It might speak out to the world but it somehow manages to forget to speak to the individual. The newsletter gets this right.

How? The NL is in no hurry to compete. Rather it takes its time to include everyone in its folds – literally. Time, pages, a knack of making people feel special, the ability to reach into the mind and heart of an individual, the intelligence to know that it can’t pull wool over its readers’ eyes – makes the NL somewhat more needed in today’s day and age.

So everybody’s on the run, nobody has the time. There are more than necessary products in the market so players need to dare and not just do. There are far too many things precious – time, money, mindspace are just some. Individuals are treated as commodities. Conversations are seen as possible conversions. Time is spent only if money is gained. And before we even know it, like the hottest-selling technology that permeates our lives, the mantra of the fast and the furious takes over our lifestyle. We can’t seem to step out of this super-fast rat race; the flow sucks us in. The irony of how new strategies evolving out of a process of change end up becoming stagnating habits escapes us completely.

But the truth is we all miss the human touch. So, if you come to realise you’re part of this humane-less rat race, it’s time to step out. Look at those running masses and notice how easily you’ve set yourself apart from the herd. At last you breathe easy.

What we’re saying is it’s time to bring back the lost art of personal touch in our communications. It’s time to acknowledge that our audience actually has individual faces. They’ve had enough of mass-designed, intrusive, techo, nano bytes of information per second coded in ads and brochures. They’re tired of it. Now they need some genuine attention. A page where the written word seems to be for him, or her. Where the message is straight from the heart. And the intention is not blatantly selfish. Where words form a bond with the reader.

It’s a myth people don’t have time for relationships. Everybody does. And we’re all trying to reach out. We’re just waiting for a hand to reach in and make all the difference.

With Newsletters it’s true - you don’t just reach out; you reach in.

March-ing forward!

With the financial year coming to a close and you working overtime to meet your yearly targets – and, if possible, exceed them – chasing numbers, framing statements, arranging more meetings… it's pandemonium! While you are keeping an alert eye on your coffers, International Women’s Day is around the bend too! Are you ready for the communication challenge these events bring? Read on, and you'll know.

Gender benders

Women today have a significant and growing presence in the workplace. So while celebrating International Women’s Day in the organisation, make a resolution to modifying your vocabulary, and apply gender-sensitivity to your communication. Doing so will not just pass you off as someone who keeps abreast of times, but also endear you to your female associates. Here are a few frequently-used words to keep in mind.

In the office or other work-related areas, it is best to use:

• ‘Personhours’ instead of ‘manhours’;
• ‘Businessperson’ instead of ‘businessman’;
• ‘Office cleaner’ or ‘housekeeper’ instead of ‘maid’;
• ‘Chairperson’ instead of ‘chairman’;
• ‘Salesperson’ or ‘sales representative’ instead of ‘salesman’/ ‘salesgirl’.

In your everyday life, use words like:

• ‘Synthetic’ or ‘artificial’ instead of ‘man-made’;
• ‘Ancestor’ instead of ‘forefather’;
• ‘Homemaker’ instead of ‘housewife’;
• ‘Layperson’ instead of ‘layman’;
• ‘Human-power’ instead of ‘manpower’.

Mind your business

Here are some popular financial terms that you probably use regularly. However, do you know how they originated? Given here are the origins of these words:

• Vesting (Earning pension over time): the verb ‘vest’ is derived from the Latin word ‘vestire’, meaning ‘to clothe, especially someone holding a rank’. So soon, the word derived the connotation of ‘to place or secure something in the legal possession of a person’.
• Budget (A sum of money allocated for a particular purpose): French merchants, in the Middle Ages, carried money in a ‘bougette’ (little bag). This word has its origins in the Latin word ‘bulga’ (a leather bag). The word got its current meaning during its import into English.
• Finance (Management of money): The word originates from the old French and Latin word ‘fine’ (end). The French word also had the connotation of ‘payment’. However, when the English adapted it in the 18th century, they began using the word only for money management.
• Money (Currency; medium of exchange): The Roman goddess Juno was responsible for warning the Romans of impending danger. So, she was called Juno Moneta – the name meaning ‘warn’ in Latin. As a tribute to her, the Romans built a temple on Capitoline Hill, which later became the place where coinage was kept. The name Moneta eventually evolved into the word money.

Newsletter – answering practical questions

It's like the four blind men trying to understand the elephant; they had their own ideas about it. You too would have your own perceptions about the newsletter. However, without knowing (more) about it, you'll hardly be able to appreciate its versatility.

So, here's an effort to help you better understand the versatile communication tool that the newsletter is.

Why do I need a newsletter?

Ever felt like reaching out to employees? Or wished to make your clients take notice of you? Or wanted to educate people about a particular issue? Ever wanted a brand ambassador who'd reflect your company's image accurately, at a fraction of the cost the celebrity would demand?

If yes, then you need a newsletter. This periodical journal can help you do all this and more. And what's more, it can do it subtly or obviously, depending on what you want. It offers you the luxury of complete customisation. You can choose what to say, whom to say it to and how. Effectively.

Well, why not use a brochure or ad or other forms of communication to meet these ends?

A brochure or an ad is seen as true marketing material, and therefore, meets with a certain resistance in the readers' minds. How often have you read the brochures you've received at shows or seen the ad leaflets that are mailed to you?

A newsletter is different as it is not perceived as a typical marketing communication effort. It can sell your brand or product without making it obvious, sometimes clothing it in the garb of information or leisure reading. Therefore your audience – be they employees, clients or other stakeholders – is likely to receive it with an open mind.

Why should I go to a specialist for creating one when I have an in-house team who can do it?

Your in-house team could very well put together a few articles and a layout and circulate it to your audience, but it may not reflect the quality and professionalism of an agency that is skilled in doing it. A specialist can help you add character to the issues, define the newsletter's identity, and create it in sync with your brand identity and communication objective.

What returns will it give me?

The returns could be many and varied, depending on your communication objectives. Here are some examples.

• Internal – help employees strengthen their bonds with the company, motivate and encourage better performance, increase awareness about issues, manage talent and indirectly, even reduce attrition.

• External – improve brand visibility, strengthen your brand image, build goodwill with clients, and also assist in marketing initiatives.

Well, now that you have an idea of what the newsletter is and what it can do, you can always call the newsletter specialists to know more about it. You can reach us at getus@cbeyond.in

Get your point across

Effective communication is about clarity and simplicity. The simpler and clearer your message is, the better are its chances of being understood. However, there's more to good communication than just this. Here are a few tips to help you get your point across, easily and effectively:

1.Identify your target audience and make a mental picture of them in terms of age, likes and dislikes, attitudes, etc. Communicating to them should be your primary goal. Everything else is secondary.

2.Next, choose a single prominent medium of communication, that will get their attention. It could be a blog, or a power point presentation, or even a printed article, depending on their demographics and psychographics.

3.Clearly identify the message or thought to be communicated. It is best to stick to one central message that is reiterated, with perhaps two sub-themes or sub-messages. That will prevent confusion of ideas.

4.Frame your message in an interactive way. That will gather the audience's interest and get them to pay attention to your thoughts

5.Keep it simple and straightforward. Use a clear style and precise words to convey what you want to say. Bombastic language may sound impressive, but if your audience has not understood what you tried to say, the purpose of your communication has been lost.

6.Make your messages personal and relevant. Customise them to suit your target group. If you need to give an example of a dance form to an Indian audience, try Bharatanatyam or Kathak, rather than Ballet or Salsa.

7.Ensure that your message is sensitive to the cultural, regional and religious sentiments of the audience. A well-intentioned statement can backfire if it hurts your audience's ideas and may land you in an embarrassing situation.

8.Avoid clichés. If it’s something your audience has seen elsewhere, they may not be impressed with what you are offering.

9.Encourage your target audience to contribute. This will go a step further to bring in a sense of belonging, especially during a presentation.

10.Humor helps, but do not use it unless it comes easily to you. A bad joke can create an unfavorable impression. It's best to intersperse your communication with interesting facts and anecdotes to break monotony.

Retaining talent the newsletter way

Some of the best-known Indian companies face serious attrition problems. What about you?

Attrition today is a HR manager's nightmare. The Indian BPO industry is currently experiencing an attrition of 25-30 per cent. The IT industry majors average between 10-20 per cent. So, many companies are now concentrating their efforts on stemming this tide.

Though attrition is a result of many factors, having certain fundamentals in place can work towards your advantage and help you retain employees. And communication is one of them. At CBEYOND we understand this and help you not just communicate, but communicate right through the newsletter.

Communication – an essential

Today, employees spend a greater part of their waking hours at work. So, to retain them and improve their productivity, your company has to be a social organisation they are in sync with. It needs to be a social network that will compel them to think twice before bidding goodbye.

Therefore, it is essential for your employees to establish a good rapport with their colleagues. They need to not just know your company's mission and goals, but also understand how it affects them and what is expected of them. However, merely conveying these thoughts don't help. Regular motivation and encouragement is essential. Moreover, your professionals need a medium through which they can share ideas and thoughts with each other, and stay updated about events and happenings.

Newsletters – the panacea

Our newsletters help you achieve all this and more through their contents. They help you send the right message to the right audience and at the right time. Use it to congratulate your top-performing teams, or to invite participation for an upcoming event. Feature an article which explains your organisational values, or simply get employees to share their ideas and experience.

Whatever be the nature of the communication, the newsletter can help you say it right and reach out to the audience. Add to this, its ability to reflect your company's branding and thoughts, and you have a communication tool tailored to meet your needs.

So, take the first and most important step to retain your talented personnel today. Communicate and communicate right with the newsletter.

CBD Case study:

Information, inspiration and integration for a software leader

A global IT solutions provider with over 5,000 employees wanted its professionals to be better integrated and feel part of the company. The challenge: diverse employee base, branches spread across geographies and employees isolated at client-sites.

CBD created an e-newsletter which functioned as a link between the company's members. It helped the employees better understand the different branches of the organisation, and also threw light on career avenues and advancement opportunities. Thus, it helped the employees better understand and identify their growth paths. Electronic transmission overcame geographical barriers, while periodic issues reduced the feeling of isolation for on-site employees.

Ph(r)ased out!

While you are at it, ensure that your messages or mails do not have the following incorrect phrases and other errors that have equally disastrous effects. So, if you’ve been using these phrases, it’s time to stop!

• Revert back. It’s just revert. The word itself means to ‘go back’.
• Redo again. Redo means ‘do again’. So, the word again, after redo, is unnecessary.
• ATM machine. ATM reads as ‘Automated Teller Machine’; you don’t need an extra ‘machine’ after the abbreviation.
• Return back. Return means ‘to come back’.
• Your’s Truly. You do not require an apostrophe in the word yours; nor should the word truly appear in uppercase. The correct usage is ‘Yours truly.’
• Abbreviations. Unless you are sure that your recipient is really familiar with the abbreviations, steer clear of them. You do not want your prospective client wondering what LOL or PFA is! (LOL is laugh out loud; PFA is Please Find Attached.)

To err is … err… human

Been overusing Short Messaging Service? Chances are that it's reflecting in your official documents too! Since perfection is the order of the day, to err renders you silly, and sometimes even offensive. Here are a couple of instances that could intrude into your official letters, emails, or places where correct written language is a must.


Word pow-err
Mistaking homonyms are the most common errors. And though it’s human that your mind may sometimes refuse to assemble them, the not-so-pretty results should motivate you to keep them away. Here are few of the frequent ones.

1.Then and than: ‘Then’ is an adverb to signify a subsequent action (e.g., we then went home); ‘than’ is a conjunction used for comparatives (e.g., Rita is taller than me)

2.Effect and affect: ‘Effect’ is a noun. It signifies a development that has been caused by an action that happened before (e.g., the medicine had a good effect on her); ‘affect’ is a verb that defines the kind and degree of ‘effect’ (e.g., how did the medicines affect her?).

3.Everyday and every day: ‘Everyday’ is an adjective to describe something common, ordinary and sometimes even mundane (e.g., it’s an everyday affaire); ‘every day’ is an adverb that means daily (e.g., it’s something I do every day).

Apostrophe catastrophe
The apostrophe catastrophe is actually quite wide spread. It’s not just the little vertical stroke that makes a difference, the words mean different too. So check twice while typing them to keep those unwanted slips out.

1.Your and you’re: ‘Your’ is a pronoun. It signifies a belonging to ‘you’ (e.g., I like your car); ‘you’re’ is a contraction of ‘you are’ (e.g., you’re home early today).

2.Its and it’s: ‘Its’ is a pronoun that translates as belonging to a thing (e.g., lay the box on its right side). ‘It’s’ is a contraction of ‘it is’ or ‘it has’ (e.g., it’s a table).

3.Their and they’re: ‘Their’ is a pronoun that means ‘of them’ (e.g., I like their house); ‘they’re’ is a contraction of ‘they are’ (e.g., they’re coming to my house this evening).

4.Whose and who’s: ‘Whose’ is a pronoun that means ‘of whom’ or ‘of which’ (e.g., whose coat is this?); ‘who’s’ is a contraction for ‘who is’ or ‘who has’ (e.g., who’s the person in charge?).

5.Lets and let’s: ‘Lets’ is a verb that pertains to allowing (e.g., she lets her dog take a walk everyday); ‘let’s’ means making something possible and is a contraction for ‘let us’ (e.g., let’s go for a picnic).

Time tested

While some phrases have perpetrated themselves through time, there have been others that have picked up pace over the last century of so. Here are few phrases – old and new – that our conversation just can’t do without.

• Tongue in cheek: What it really means is to pretend to be serious when one is actually joking. This phrase originated from the action of biting ones tongue in the effort to suppress laughter. So, you put your tongue in your cheek when you bite it off with the side teeth.
• Stink to high heaven: It is used to describe strong odour. Shakespeare could have been the father of this one. The phrase occurs in his play “Hamlet” in the lines uttered by the king of Denmark, his uncle, Claudius: “O, my offense is rank, it smells to heaven;”
• Rub it in: It translate as, saying or doing something intending to make someone feel worse. It could have cropped up from another phrase: “rubbing salt to a wound”. Or it could also have come from the action of driving in something by rubbing it.
• Mark my words: An emphatic declaration, it means that the speaker’s words will be proven true eventually. This phrase comes from the fact that the word ‘mark’ actually meant to write it down or mark the words in ink. That way it was a written proof that could be verified later.

Festive fine print

New Year is here! Lots of wishes for a prosperous and joyous year are going around. You probably have wished, or are still in the process of wishing your family, friends, clients, and prospective customers the very best for 2008. But wait a minute. Did you go out this year too and buy a tonne of greeting cards that you promptly handed over to your assistant to send out? Oops! If you have already, then make amends next year, but if you haven't, then, there's still time to make your New Year wishes special.

Make sure you put a little thought into your New Year cards and you can be sure that they will be much appreciated. Here are some things you can do.

• Personal touch: Whether it’s your friend or a potential client, address the recipient of the card by name. Personalising your messages has a positive impact and also makes the recipient feel special. After all, won’t you too like a card addressing you in person?
• Title check: The next important thing to do is to address your recipient correctly. Slips like addressing a woman as ‘Mr’, or vice-versa are inexcusable. The direct impact is obviously negative, and you could make or mar millions with just this one move. Take the trouble to find out if you have never personally interacted with the recipient and are aware of only the last name.
• Sign up: Sign all the cards you send out personally. The time you spend doing it, will be well worth it; and you will reap its benefits throughout the year.
• Think new: Saying the same old “Wishing you a happy and prosperous New Year” is passé. Just saying something as simple as “Wishing you 365 days of joy and prosperity” changes the entire feel of the message.
• Double check: Proof what you have written, because grammar and spelling mistakes are unacceptable. It does create a bad impression even if it is just with your family.

A newsletter for you too

The message is clear: communicate or perish.

In today's demanding business world, there are many things you compete for: market share, quality employees, stakeholder's attention. And to win them all, you need to communicate and communicate right. Sometimes clearly, sometimes cleverly. Sometimes emphatically, sometimes subtly.

Whatever be the nature of your communication, the newsletter can help, as it has in the following cases.

Case study one: taking the 'sales' out of the sales talk

A real estate company wanted to keep its clients informed about its ongoing and future projects and promote its ventures. However, this had to be done in a subtle way, without making the communication sound like a marketing effort.

A theme-based newsletter that focused on promoting Bangalore as 'the place to be in' was the solution. While the first few pages had articles that chronicled the city's glory, the next few pages displayed the company's projects. The reader looked forward to the informative articles, the company looked forward to reaching out to them.

Case study two: earning goodwill

A well-known hospital had twin goals to meet: keep in touch with its clients and enhance brand recall subtly.

The answer arrived in the form of an informal newsletter that spoke on health and wellness. The content was informative, yet light-hearted, giving the audience appropriate material for leisure reading. A logo and a help-line number on the last page, gave just the right prominence to the brand, enhancing its visibility and recall.

Case study three: attracting and engaging talent

Engage employees yet to join the organisation. Create a positive impression on a database of prospective employees.

With this mandate, a well-known technology leader circulated two newsletters. They spoke of current technology, shared corporate gyan, had a corner for leisure and created the impression of company that truly cared for its people. Bright, cheerful colours added to the feeling of warmth. Fresh layouts were appealing. The company found an effective way of building loyalty with people, who were yet to even become part of it.

So, whatever be your requirement, rest assured the newsletter can help. Rest assured, there's a newsletter for you too.

Colours of the sea

Remember all those walks down a long stretch of beach, picking up shells and other treasures that the sea yielded at your feet? The joy of every beach comber lies in the treasures that he discovers while strolling along. A unique shell, a bunch of weathered pebbles, little pieces of broken pottery; each brings with it an unmatched charm. But the one thing that sets pulses racing is the discovery of a brilliantly coloured, well weathered shard of Sea Glass.

Rare, colourful, spectacular: three nice words to describe these lovely gems; though not quite completely. But what exactly is sea glass? And where do they come from? Well, a shard of sea glass actually begins its exotic journey as a bottle, glass, crockery or any glass product. The sea connection comes in only if it gets tossed into the sea. Once there, the waves and the currents take their time – tossing, breaking and tumbling it around until they are just right to be washed ashore. Of course, there are certain indirect causes for their existence too.

Back in the early 1990s when plastic wasn’t in use; most of the products came in glass jars. Moreover, recycling hadn’t quite caught on. Now, with the phenomenon of recycling having caught on, and plastics being widely used, sea glass is becoming more and more difficult to find.

Sea glass is rare. And depending on the colour, it can even be likened to precious stones in value. The rarity of sea glass colours depends on whether the glass colours are still in use or not. Glass colours that have not been manufactured for quite a long while – post mid-19th century – fall under the rare category.

Sea glass colours can be categorized under common, unique, rare and even to treasures. Colours like green, white and brown fall in the ‘common’ category. That is because these colours are still in wide use. Right from medicines, wine and regular fare, green, white and brown can be readily found. It’s the shades of green like emerald green and aqua green that fall in the rare category. Other colours of sea glass that fall in the rare category include cobalt blue, amber, lavender, yellow and seafoam green. These colours are no longer used in glass.

However, the rarest of the lot are colours like red, orange, gray, teal, milk white, aqua, jadeite, lime green, light blue, opaque blue and shades of pink, yellow and green in depression glass. But that’s not the end. There are finds that can be likened to treasure too. Like bottle or glass bottoms, glass with imprints and markings, or perfectly round marbles which could easily have come from the ballast of ships, to glass stoppers and corks. They are few and far between and it’s your lucky day if you chance upon them.

Fashion and folly

When it comes to fashion, I have often wondered, who it was that first set the ball rolling: made the first ‘fashion statement’. Was it God? As shown in the Bible, with his long, wise, white beard and a pristine white gown as he bellowed – “Let there be Light” – into endless void. Beard wagging, gown billowing and a golden girdle fluttering in the gale and the world suddenly being lit up with light! Sigh! What a statement of power, omnipotence and style that must have been!

Any wonder that he shooed Adam and Eve away from the Tree of Knowledge, lest they should discover his secrets. But woe! Eve ‘fell’ to temptation and rose to knowledge; and Adam followed suit. But fabric was still a long way off. God held the controls and he denied his disobedient children any access. Deprived of fabric or any of the resources I Eden, they had to make do with fig leaves. And lo! Even before they knew it, Eve and Adam set fashion rolling.

Fig was probably great for Eden climate, but earth was harsh. There was winter, and summer and other seasons in between. So fig leaves, I think, soon flew out of the window. Animal skin came along – fur and print in place – and sheep skin, and then wool from sheep. Cotton must have entered the scene only when Adam got down to serious field work. Besides, imagine the horrors of wearing a fur coat in the summers!

But cotton grown is not the end of the story. Someone had to figure out and then weave it to perfection. Eve must have done a great job with that; and even perfected it to an art over time. And once she felt she too could divinely proclaim “this be fashion”, she went into the neighbourhood strutting her stuff and made all the other ladies envious. These ladies, as it is in most cases emulated the object of their envy. And so spread trends. Either way, what is of more concern is that she passed the art of ‘fashion’ down to her children; who in turn passed it down to theirs. So much so, that we have pretty good samples doing the rounds now.

But Adam himself could not have disappeared after the cotton was grown. Besides, he would have needed clothes too. And from what we see of men’s clothes today, he must have set some trends himself too. But how? Especially if he had to toil all day at the fields to grow cotton and a lot more besides. Well, after the day’s work, I figure, Adam must have gone for a drink somewhere, or socialized. And since men fall under the envious lot too, trends spread there as well.

The rest, as they say, is history; and a bit of geography too. And history today is in such a stage that we almost find fashions from every human era on display and in use.

The perfect vacation?

Have you ever been on a vacation where everything was just perfect? The place you visited was way better than you imagined, the staff were so much nicer than you thought they would be, and even the food was brilliant! A dream situation? Not really! There are many places in India that could give you the perfect getaway.

Imagine a log cabin that opens out onto a reservoir. In the distance you can see blue hills lazing on the water, you can hear soft waves lapping against the hillside, and feel the chill breeze on your face. Trees surround your cozy abode, and birds and butterflies visit your balcony. You are truly in the lap of nature, and enjoying every minute of it. You're excited about the jungle safari, you're equipped with your field glasses to watch some amazing birds, and you are completely relaxed and don't even remember what your little cubicle at work looks like anymore. Perfect isn't it? Hmm... think again!

You see, it doesn't matter how much you try to run away from the city and into the wild outdoors, unless you take the lonely traveler route, you are bound to meet the craziest of all animals – the human! Yes! That wild scream you heard was no critter, it was your regular tourist, trying to impress his young wife, or her family. Sigh! And now they even have music blaring! Well, one must be tolerant.

Of course, what follows would knock the word “tolerant” out of one's vocabulary forever! At tea you realize that your friendly neighborhood noisy-man is not alone! Yes the wife is there, accompanied by her family that seems to find noisy-man's jokes irresistibly funny, and to add to it, a young child who promptly whips out his Game Boy and makes it quite clear that he did not want to make the trip at all! Deep breath. Stay calm. Try to visualize a beautiful evening.

It's safari time! Oh... you have to ride with noisy-man and his family. Still, maybe it will be fine. Keep the happy visual. His first question – “How long is this safari going to take? What! Two hours! That long! What will we do!” Your initial reaction – “Get off!” Ah... if only! Still, the jeep moves on and you're in the jungle.

There's something about the jungle that can really make you take a long hard look at yourself. There is always a sense of excitement, and yet a tinge of fear. At some point your mind conjures up images of tigers pouncing on the jeep, or a giant elephant blocking your way. But then there is the silence of the jungle, with sounds of birds and crickets, the tall trees, the foliage, the sun streaming down through the leaves, the sense of mystery and the knowledge that beyond what you can see, life in all its beauty thrives. “Where are the animals?” – second question. This is not a zoo silly-man, it's a jungle. This is a wildlife safari! The animals are not on display here! For all you know, we are!

Silly-man however persists. “What is this, I can't see any animals... oh look! A mosquito!” The family guffaws at their son-in-laws wit! The guides, who are actually very interested in what they do and love the forest, are beginning to show signs of irritation. But the poor souls can't possibly retort, 'customer is king' you see. So the chatter continues, the idiotic jokes flow, and then we see spotted deer! Oh good, just when you thought you wouldn't see a thing with all the racket! You focus to get a good picture, “Choo!” What! Did silly-noisy-man just shoo away the spotted dear? That he did, and even instigated the child to do the same. You are really beginning to wonder where these people have come from and why they are on a safari if they don't want to see any animals. The guide tells them not to scare the animals but it doesn't look like anyone is listening.

Moving along, more bad jokes, more taunting animals and the guide, all in the name of humour. Please God... let's see something! Gasp! Can it be true? Right ahead... a tiger! Wow! The jungle has shown favour on you. The eight-year-old, yellow, black and orange striped beauty walks majestically before you on the path! He turns...looks at the jeep, and carries on. This is his territory and he will stroll in it as he pleases. All you can do is follow dumb-founded. For the first time, the noisy family does not say a word. Then the tiger goes into the undergrowth and sits down, quite close to the path. He stares at you, and for a brief moment you lock eyes with one of the most beautiful, and awe-inspiring creatures of the jungle. As people scramble to take pictures, excited and even afraid, the jeep moves! What! Why?

The guide protests, and the driver says that noisy-silly-man's mother-in-law, who we must say had the safest spot next to the driver, pestered the driver to move! To leave a sitting tiger in the wild, when people wait a lifetime to spot one... how could she do this!

Sigh! What more can we say now. A perfect safari tainted by ignorance, and insensitivity. A scar forever on your memories of a vacation, and yet, an interesting story to tell your friends on your return! What happens next? Well you carry on with the rest of your time at the lodge, trying your best to avoid the crazy family and make the best of what you have. One thing's for sure though, anytime you take a vacation, be prepared to meet some really weird people!

Refreshingly teasome

Drinking tea is now the rage among many middle class, urban folk who are looking for an interesting evening out. Tired of the din of the coffee shops, and having drunk one hazel-nut flavored latte too many, beverage lovers turn to tea bars. A cozy ambiance, a variety of teas from all over the world, and a delicate experience make for an attractive sales package. The waiters bring you a little strainer, a timer, perfectly squared little sugar cubes, and all sizes and shapes of cups and saucers for your exotic teas. You unintentionally straighten up, take in a whiff of the fragrance, and nibble on your food. And suddenly, you realize why the English make such a fuss about their afternoon tea!

Ah, but look at the menu! Should you try the little flowers they say bloom in the pot, or should you try the fruit flavored tea? And what exactly is a tea made of hand-rolled tea leaves? All the variety and oriental names could make your head spin! So, knowing a little bit about this rather genteel beverage can help you make a choice you won't regret.

Simplitea

Tea is the dried and processed leaves of a plant called camellia sinensis. All teas come from this species of plant, but much depends on where the plant is grown and how it is processed. There are three major varieties – China, which have small leaves and thrive on higher altitudes, India (or Assam), which have larger leaves and thrive on lower altitudes, and Hybrid, which are somewhat in-between Chinese and Indian.

Fantastic Four

The four basic kinds of teas are black tea, green tea, oolong tea and white tea. What is called herbal tea, is not tea at all, but a mixture of flowers and leaves. A refreshing beverage all the same.

A friend for life: Black Tea
How many times have you curled up with a book and a hot cup of black tea? Or made a steaming cup of tea on a rainy day? By and large, black tea is the most common of the four teas and has the highest caffeine. It still has antioxidant properties but not as much as the others. In India, the expression 'black tea' is also used to describe a cup of tea without milk, where the common practice is to add milk or cream.

You could choose from a variety of Chinese teas – Lapsang with its strong smoky flavor, Keemun, Dian Hong, and Ying De Hong. Then there are the familiar teas from Assam, Ceylon, Darjeeling and the Nilgiris. Black teas are often blended with various plants that give us a variety of flavors. The popular Earl Grey has bergamot oil in it, the Irish Breakfast is a blend of many black teas, and the English Breakfast is a full-bodied, rich blend that goes well with milk and sugar.

Another popular variety is black tea mixed with fruits and spices creating tantalizing aromas and flavors such as cinnamon tea, raspberry tea, mango tea and so on. If you like the fruit, you are sure to love the tea.
A healthy order: Green Tea
You must have heard that Green teas are good for your system, and that they might even cure some serious illnesses. Well, the claims may not be scientifically proved, but many will swear by the tea's medicinal properties. Whether you drink it for its health benefits or not, the beverage is refreshing.

Green teas are low in caffeine and have high antioxidant properties with a taste of fresh leaves. You could try the gunpowder – a full-bodied tea with a hint of smokiness; kukicha – a Japanese tea of leaves and white twigs; li zi nutcracker – a Chinese tea with a nutty taste; or spiced green teas with different flavors. Green tea can be a little different on the palate for someone who isn't used to it, but once you begin to like it, you will enjoy it throughly.

A taste of China: Oolong Tea

Watching oolong tea unfurl in a tea pot is the best way to begin the experience of drinking the tea.
The most difficult to process, the best oolong teas are commonly brewed to be strong with the bitterness leaving a sweet and pleasant aftertaste. The taste of the oolong is between black and green tea. The most famous oolongs are those produced in the Wuyi Mountains of the Fujian Province and in the Central Mountains of Taiwan.
The teas come with a variety of fragrances that are both tantalizing and soothing. The jasmine tea is quite popular, as are the oolongs from Darjeeling.

Pristine beverage: White Tea
These are the least processed of any tea and tastes most like fresh leaves. A subtle taste, the tea has an air of delicacy about it, and high antioxidant properties. You can take your pick from the Silver Needle, the White Penoy, the Tribute Eyebrow, or the fruity, darker LongLife Eyebrow. You could also try the Ceylon White, which has pine and honey liquor, the light and fluffy Darjeeling White, the sweet Assam White, or the nectar sweet White Puerh Tea.
Well, that was our basic introduction to teas. Now take the plunge and savor this lovely beverage.

The business of going virtual!

Management author Tom Peters says ,"Biz Blogging - WORKS. It is of - MONUMENTAL IMPORTANCE."

In the nineties, a virtual presence meant a website or an ad banner on prominent portals. Static web design didn't capture customer information, while expensive ad banners couldn't really bring in the numbers, given the meagre usage of the Internet in India.

Today, things have changed. And how! The Internet - post the dotcom burst - has bounced back and is ubiquitously used for business. So, how do you use the virtual medium for your business, both internally and externally?

Yes, websites and ads exist today too, but now you also have avenues like blogs, e-newsletters and extensive portals. Gone are static websites; multi-functional websites now give you Flash imaging, extensive scripting, data capture capabilities, and enhanced e-Commerce functionality ensures that you can sell almost anything.

Talking of ads, the Internet giant Google has redefined Internet Ads with their Google Ads programme, which permeates into every avenue on the Internet, from your email to your Google search. Ad banners or island ads in websites are blasé now! Google ads are the thing for virtual business - it ensures that you get maximum eye balls and everyone has a win-win!

Portals, as always, come with the challenge of sustaining content. Fresh, new ideas and content, rule the popularity of portals and the absence of these doesn't pull in readers; taking with them, revenue-generating ads and business prospects too. Indian portal giants like indiatimes.com, rediff.com, and indiaplaza.com have managed to sustain by growing bigger than the competition. These guys are worth emulating because they've managed to sustain customers through multiple channels, e-Commerce and ads.

So, that's that about some virtual business avenues. But, what has really grown larger than life today is blogging and e-newsletters. Both are mediums that allow you to speak to an audience both internally and externally. Interactive and effective communication with employees and the outside world, can help your company be different and survive fierce competition. Biz blogs educate customers and allow you speak to a dedicated target base about your business or product. CEOs use it to communicate with their global offices world over, engaging with thousands of employees at the same time. Blogging is personal, its frequency depends on you and allows people the option to respond to you. Rudy Karsan, Chairman and CEO of Kenexa has used it extensively. Other organisations have used it as a vehicle for addressing HR issues, media issues, brand promotions (such as the Sunsilk Gang of Girls blog), keeping in touch with customers, and so on.

Then come internal and external newsletters. Fast, inexpensive and better than most other media, e-newsletters have taken on a huge responsibility, today. It's no longer about just informing people but a whole lot about positioning, branding and saying it right. Check out www.wattsupcooperbussmann. com and you'll know what I mean. This organisation has a website just for their newsletter and is saying so much by way of this medium.

A well-made e-newsletter is easy to email, compatible with many web-based platforms, and brings customers back to your website with every click. Chances are that these customers will remain engaged on your website for a longer duration if they spot some other interesting information there. Of course, for this your website also needs to be effectively designed!

So, your newsletter goes across the globe, is easy to sustain as newsletters are produced with specific frequencies, giving you enough time to generate compelling content and whetting the appetite of your readers. Against the popular blogs, they rate well too because e-newsletters are generally mailed out to readers (push-based) against blogs that are pull-based and need the reader to come looking for them. Lastly, but most importantly, e-newsletters are sent out to email IDs, against physical newsletters that need to be posted and come back a là ‘return-to-sender' if your customer has moved!

These are the means of virtual marketing today and it's just a matter of time before every business needs to go virtual by using one or more of these. A wise businessman sees the writing on the wall and acts before the competition does. Cheers to your virtual business!

- Article written by Sandeep Nanu, CBEYOND

It’s simple. It’s efficient. It says it all!

Print media enjoyed unparalleled status at the start of the last decade. It was the No. 1 choice of advertisers who looked at defining their Corporate/ brand image. And, why not? Being the ubiquitous medium, it was a natural choice. Publications gladly looked at increasing their reader-per-copy; and their
ad-rates too!

Then, at the turn of the present decade, the action moved to TV, with the sky having opened up to satellite TV. Suddenly, corporates wanting to target more eye-balls and deliver the message more effectively, had a plethora of channels to choose from - from a vanilla DD to the differently-flavored entertainment, news and business channels. And of, course marketing budgets rose to unseen heights.

Other popular choices, today, include media like the Radio, Outdoor and the Internet. The Radio was never the first choice of premium brands, unless the target segment was extremely specific or it was jingles for recruitment purposes. However, the outdoor media, seemed a good choice with digitization of images, giving you excellent quality to represent your brand well. But it's reach is largely local.

Coming to the Internet - largely a pull-based medium, it is difficult to grab the attention of the reader, given the space and word constraints. Impressing the mouse-click-happy reader is possible only through a well-designed website, in the absence of which, you might just end up looking like a cheesy body-shop!

And so, we're left with the print and electronic media as the two best choices for brand-building. The trend over the years, where these are concerned, has clearly been - small is beautiful. Crunching ad space, while hiking rates, suits the space providers, forcing advertisers to extract more bang per buck, or pay through their nose! And, let's face it, using ad-strips to convey your brand identity is not my way of brand-building. Is it yours?

So, where does the simple answer to your branding needs lie? It's in the simple newsletter that wins hands-down in the cost-benefit analysis. The advantages it brings to your organization are far too many to be ignored. Used as a tool, primarily to inform your clients, associates, vendors, employees, and the market in general, about everything you think they need to know, it silently builds your organization's brand, image, status, ethos, and what have you. It gives you the space to say just what you want - not anything and everything, like your website, and not incoherent snippets, like your ad-strips. Unlike the bill-boards, that are city-centric, your newsletter can travel anywhere you want it to. Digitization of images? Well, the same digitization of hoardings, makes your newsletter images look as dapper as the Saville Row suit its reader wears!

Content of your newsletter establishes your superiority over your domain and lets you woo prospective employees quietly, yet effectively. It lauds your achievements and milestones, informing the right audience about the right things. More value over the perfect reach! All this, at wonderful cost efficiency to your organization, as readers-per-copy increase!

And lastly, while exorbitant ad-budgets ensure that the biggies get their due through the press or the telly, what happens to the small and medium-scale businesses? Faced with constant challenges of growth, they are stuck in the chicken and egg problem of brand-hence-growth or growth-hence-brand. Unable to afford the big spends, they still want to brand.

Our answer is the newsletter. It's Simple. Efficient. And says it all.

- Article written by Sandeep Nanu, CBEYOND

Are you ignoring your brand ambassador?

It's surprisingly simple. Send your sales force out; arm them with a few glib lines; let them zero-in on prospects and then spill it all out to them.

There, you have it. The easiest way of destroying your brand image and ensuring that your sales pitch is thrown right out of the window.

Ruining your brand image is any day easier than building it. Of course, this is not the only way of doing it. You could also ensure long-lasting damage to your credibility and image by sending out badly-designed communication material. Such as, a casually put-together newsletter.

Not many realise, but a newsletter is as much a brand ambassador for your company, as your celebrity endorser is. What's more, this brand ambassador has more advantages than your celebrity does. It can be sent time and again. Can be left behind with the client or prospect. Can be customised to meet your requirements. And, at costs that'll surely have your finance team nodding in delight.

This journal can aid in creating brand recall for your company. Select topics that will interest your target audience. Add a bit of style, a dash of creative design, and you have ready a classy newsletter. Send it to your audience. Free. They'll certainly give it a second look. As unlike your mailer or brochure, it's offering them information, and not trying to hard-sell. Hard-sell meets with resistance and a guarded mind. But not information. Do this periodically and your audience will want to know more about the brand bringing it to them. Subtly place company information in it, and you would have surely managed to strike a chord with/leave a mark on your desired audience.

So, you've overcome the first barrier of resistance. Next, capitalise on the gain. After a few consecutive issues, when you've managed to create your brand image, your marketing executive can interact directly with the prospect. He will certainly have a more willing audience now than if he had tried forcing a sales pitch earlier. Weaving a product or service info into this conversation will hardly be difficult for your representative now.

Here's a tip. The newsletter is also useful if you want to keep in touch with your existing clients. What better way to say ‘hi,' and tell your clients you remember them? Or, to share your company's achievements and latest developments? However, the trick is to get it right. You could get your Marketing team to piece it together and mail it out. But it should have the same class and panache as a professionally-designed one. It should also be in tune with your design guidelines to link it with your corporate identity.

Moreover, since the newsletter is your company's brand ambassador, it should have as much an impact as a TV commercial or a newspaper advertisement would. Therefore, it requires the same care and thought in execution. It wouldn't do to have a badly dressed ambassador or to let clients spot flaws, would it? So, let the professionals do their work. Treat every newsletter as a marketing initiative that needs priority.

Internally too, the newsletter can help achieve goals. It can bring together employees scattered across locations, inject a sense of belonging, and increase enthusiasm. It can act as their forum to share and communicate news and thoughts. The result: improved productivity, greater contribution, hence, better sales. All in all, it implies better bottom lines.

So, if you want to put your corporate communications right, it's time you gave the newsletter a chance; and your brand ambassador the credit it deserves.

- Article written by Sandeep Nanu, CBEYOND